This weekend , I tried a new approach to the guessing game of paying the babysitter. I told them how much I was willing to pay for their help ahead of time, and I outlined what I expected to happen while I was gone. It was a Take It or Leave It approach, and it worked. But there was a little bit of eye-rolling when I stated that my price for three hours with two kids was $15. Apparently I am way below the curve of what people are paying in our neighborhood.
My position is that it is not a terribly hard job: I don’t expect them to be the mom, I expect them to watch a movie with my kids and feed them a little pre-made dinner. Probably almost exactly what they would be doing at home for free. If I could afford to pay them more, I would expect them to do more, like clean my house, make the dinner and do the dishes. But I know my budget, so I tell them that I don’t expect much extra and pray that it will go smoothly for them. If I had a new baby, I would pay extra for the inevitable emotional drain and possible sore muscles from carrying the baby. If I had really intense or difficult kids, I would pay them more because they would have earned more (and just to make sure they are willing to come back).
After the babysitter took my offer, because we are friends and I was interested, she and her brother started talking about what they get paid for other jobs. He said that he usually earns $30-40 each time he mows someone’s lawn. He was bewildered when a man in our ward said $20 was too much to pay for just mowing his lawn. Then he said that regular, non-LDS people pay $50 per time that he mows their lawn! FIFTY DOLLARS. I believe my brother charged $50 for a summer-long commitment of lawn mowing for each house on his route.
So the kids are saying, “This is so great! I am making so much money!” And the adults are saying, “Well, I guess if that is what people are paying, I had better stay competitive with what I pay too.” And the price keeps inflating higher and higher. But what are the consequences?
First, I get a babysitter twice a year. I can’t afford it otherwise. Other moms feel the same way. So the teenagers are potentially losing out on steady work and the commitment of holding a regular babysitting job because the going rate is more than many families can afford. My friends and I get around that by simply swapping kids with each other, which is fantastic and cheap. So we aren’t the ones missing out in the situation–its the teenager who could have some money more often, rather than lots of money occasionally.
And second, we are creating an unrealistic expectation for kids in what their time and energy is actually worth. When I was a kid, babysitting was a low-paying, under-age job, but at least we earned something until we were 16 and we could go out and get a grocery store or restaurant job and really start earning money. Now, we are inflating teenager’s wages for babysitting and yard work and the minimum wage job at the grocery store down the street is not enticing at all. They don’t want to get a formal job for less money than they they are used to getting around the neighborhood. I had one teen tell me that he hated his pizza place job because “they treat me like a trained monkey. I think they want to work me to death.” Yes, real jobs are hard and often crummy. But they are stepping stones to greater things. Experience is important when are applying for a better job than the one you currently have. If they don’t want to work at the pizza place in high school, and then they don’t want to work at a college job (because they don’t pay enough or it is not the kind of work they like), how are they going to get a job out of college with absolutely no experience? We complain about paying the mechanic or the plumber for their labor and yet we freely overpay these unskilled teenagers to their own detriment. And it is not just teenagers that have this inflated self-conception. Everyone does. (See comments below for further examples).
A recent article stated that only 28% of teenagers (16-18) have their drivers licenses, down from 46% of licensed teens in 1983. Their unemployment rate is 24%–fully three times the national average. Yes, it is getting more expensive to do things, but also many kids just don’t seem to be very motivated to chase after things. Many of them are content to be carted around by their parents, have things paid for by their parents, and take their time reaching adulthood. Maybe this is the same argument that has been made in every generation (starting with the words, “In my day. . .”), but from my perspective teenagers have never before been so impressive or so useless. There are some really stellar kids out there making their way. And there are some really pathetic ones. Their potential spans a great chasm, and we should all be anxious to help them climb from mediocrity to impressiveness.
The Value of Hard Work and Desperation
In my day, my siblings and I would do anything to earn a little extra money. We were desperate. Lemonade stands, selling fruit from our orchard door to door. I even remember setting up a restaurant in our gazebo in the yard, making sandwiches with the food from our kitchen, and then expecting my mom to come and buy the food from me (so she had to buy the same stuff twice–at the grocery store, then the gazebo. She refused, but in exchange for a free sandwich, she let us keep selling her food to other people). If I could scrape together enough money to go to the movie, I was set. That creative ability to solve my money problems has led me all over the work-world–to Taiwan, a mountain summer camp, cleaning college buildings, working nights in a cherry factory, doing “handyman projects” that I (and my boss) were totally unqualified to do, crocheting afghans, cleaning houses, even writing a couple of articles for a local food magazine. Nevermind my college degree and legitimate, steady jobs. I was willing to work almost anywhere and I have patchworked my 31 years with adventure, travel, crummy jobs, boredom and new skills.
And my level of ambition is put to shame by the previous generation’s. My father-in-law is a remarkably tenacious worker. When he was ten, he decided that he wanted a horse. Period. His parents said, “No, we don’t have any place to put it, you can’t have a horse”. But he was undeterred. He got on his bike and made some inquiries. He found a stable that he could board a horse and a place to buy hay. Now, he just needed a horse, and money to buy it. He first saved up his money so that he could buy a lawnmower, then he mowed lawns, saved his lunch money every day instead of buying lunch, turned in pop bottles for about a dollar a day, saved his birthday money–in short, he didn’t spend a thing. (Keep in mind: he was TEN). When he was 11, he had finally saved up about $300 in 1970 dollars (equivalent to $1,775 today).
He saw an ad in the paper for an Appaloosa for sale in LaVerkin, Utah that he thought would be a good fit. $200. So he called up his bishop, who had a horse trailer, and they went down to buy the horse. He got Callie (named for her Calico coat) all set up in her stall and then went home and told his mom, “I bought a horse.” “You did not!” “I did. I’ll show you if you want.” So they drove down there together and she was blown away. He would ride his bike across town each day after school to feed and ride Callie. He kept working to earn the money for her hay and board.
Desperation begets creativity. Creatively solving problems gives kids confidence to do more. Confidence in doing more leads to success. Overpaying kids upends the whole cycle.
Guidelines
So I propose a unified approach to the question of What Do You Pay The Babysitter:
- If you aren’t already sure of what you want to pay, try setting your price relative to the price of a movie ticket. Everyone’s cost of living is different, so it isn’t reasonable to say $5/hour across the world. But if it takes about two hours to earn the money to go to a 2-hour movie, that seems fair. Movies here are $10 a ticket, I think, so I would pay $5 an hour for kids under the age of 16.
- Lay out your proposal from the beginning so you can avoid the awkward car ride conversation when you are dropping them off. “Is that enough? Is that okay?” “yeah, it’s fine. Whatever is fine.” This also lets the teenager refuse the job if they feel it isn’t worth their time. I remember the agony of wondering what they were going to pay me–sometimes even if they were going to remember to pay me. It gives them more confidence when they are agreeing to the job.
- Point out exactly what you would like to have them do while you are gone. “I need you to feed them all, and then clear up the table and put the dishes in the sink. If you do the dishes, I will pay you $2 extra. Then put the kids to bed, make sure they have their pajamas on and their teeth brushed. After the kids are in bed, if you want an extra $2, feel free to clean up the house.” Think of hiring a teenage babysitter as a training opportunity for their upcoming “real job”.
- If kids decide that they really want to develop their babysitting skills by taking CPR courses, or making a babysitting kit to bring with them, then we ought to respect their improving skills and pay them more. I have a friend who saved up all of her money for college by babysitting kids in the DC area, even holding summer camps in her home for groups of kids. I’m not saying that we should underpay anyone. I’m saying that these kids should earn their money. So if it is an easy job, they have earned $5 an hour, if my kids are difficult, then they have earned $10 an hour by putting up with them. If they save them from a house fire, they get a bonus! If they have developed themselves professionally to a point where they are actively engaging with my kids, taking care of the house, feeding them healthy foods and getting them to bed on time, they are earning more than $5. But to sit and and watch a show, leave the house a mess and put the baby to bed with a saggy diaper– they haven’t earned much. We need to require responsible, accountable employees, and they will learn skills that will make them employable out in the world.
- Paying the “going rate” blindly or proudly isn’t doing our babysitters any favors. If this resonates with you, please share the article with your neighborhood friends and ward members. It will be more effective if all of the parents in your circle are on the same page. Let’s do what little we can to reinforce responsibility and healthy ambition in these kids!
(If you dare to descend into the pit of the comment section, be warned, it’s a dirty place. And then please check out my response to the responses.)
In Defense of Women 
I find it interesting like the teens in the neighborhood or even the moms got together and price fixed babysitting rates….
As long as the babysitter or lawn mower knows the requirements and agrees, it’s called a contract. As long as both sides are happy, they will continue to work together
If the babysitter finds a better deal, they have every right to take it. If you are unhappy with the care, you have every right to find someone else.
To rip on teens or other moms because you don’t like the prices isn’t fair – if you don’t like the price of peaches, buy bananas. You don’t picket the grocery store.
Parents of teen workers also need to help out. My daughter was a diligent worker to earn $ for her horse. When she was about 13 I actually had to go to a neighbor and tell them to pay her half what they had paid because it was far too much for the job, her self esteem and future expectations. She totally understood while being a little unhappy when I made her split the difference and give some back. Sometimes, however, people appreciate the freedom having a dog/kid sitter affords more than we know.
I don’t need babysitters anymore but when I did, I always paid them well. There is no excuse to be cheap when it comes to someone caring for your children. If they don’t do a good job then don’t ask them again, but I guarantee if you pay well, you will always be able to get a babysitter when you need one and they will want to do a good job for you. There is a lot of responsibility placed on a babysitter…..they are taking care of your most precious possession!!!!! They should be paid well! 5 bucks an hour is not enough.
I agree, You get what you pay for… If your willing to be cheap on a babysitter don’t expect much. If you pay them decently then you can expect a decent job and your precious children to be well taken care of.
The way we pay our babysitters is $2/hr base with a $1/kid. If I left a mess I don’t expect them to clean up. But if they make a mess whether with dinner or playing with the kids I expect them to clean it up. If they clean up my mess ie dishes in the sink, sweeping or vacuuming I tend to give them extra. When they don’t clean up I don’t call back. I have plenty of teens wanting to watch my kids.
I used to charge $8 hr for 2 kids…$2 for each additional kid. Fair and I always went above and beyond. They were taking my weekend nights, as a 16 year old in 1996, with her own car, this was a big deal. I feel for my own expenses, I charged fairly for the duties I fullfilled.
OH, I’m non-LDS in the midwest.
@jancisco – Thank you for your post, and your later response. I came across your post today thanks to friends on Facebook. My friends and I agree with you. I was originally going to post a comment of support, but the negative comments I read made me question doing so! Thank you for reminding us all that you are a real person. And thank you for having an uplifting, inspiring blog! You’ve gained a reader.
I was a babysitter for many years. On very, very few occasions did I work for parents who showed appreciation for someone who took good care of their children. I would be able to tell after one time who loved their money more than their kids. You make it sound so easy, put on a movie, sit on the couch, hang out! Yeah right! It’s not that easy. Most of the time, especially for a sitter, children are extra active, always demanding attention and a good sitter will give them that. Completely wearing theirselves out, physically and emotionally. Parents like you, that worry about your money more than the attention and care your children are getting, make me sick. I’m 50+ years old now and will no longer babysit for anyone other than my grandchildren. I would rather dig ditches for a living than babysit for people like you. I hope your children never know how you really feel.
I used to babysit for $1/hr/kid…and I did an excellent job. That rate was pretty standard for most of the families for which I babysat. They were mostly young, newer parents and had VERY little money. I was honored to help out…not always, but I learned a lot. I think it prepared me to be a more loving father and helpful husband. On the other hand, I’ve always paid much better than that for the reasons you mentioned. However, as a consequence we are able to have babysitters less.
I feel hurt when I hear such things. This mother could be a stay at home mother who works so hard each and everyday for her children and have a husband who is the sole provider for her family and what if they only make enough to afford $10 to $15 a month extra for for babysitting after they have paid bills and other expenses for their family and their children. The fact that they are willing to spend any money to first of all help out a young man or young women understand responsibility and most importantly get out of the house themselves and go on a date shows such great care for others and their children. Children need to see their parents date. They need to see their parents leave and show that their parents care about eachother more than them. Children need parents who spend time together to show love to eachother and build and strengthen their relationship as husband and wife. Children need to see mommy and daddy in love. Not seeing that is more detrimental to their children than being left alone with a babysitter a few times watching movies. And if the babysitter wants to be a great one and do dishes and play with the children and drain themselves emotionally how wonderful is that but she can only afford what she can and the fact that she puts her family first and quite frankly a young man or woman who can babysit first to hire someone for a few times in the year shows great responsibility as a mother because she wants to do what she can afford to help a young man or woman gain responsibility and what she can to show her children that mommy and daddy love eachother.
True kids need to see love and parents might indeed be in a tight financial situation. How about we apply her “father-in-law story” to this reasoning. Her children are worth a lot, some might say priceless. So she and her husband save the money needed to pay a fair wage to the babysitter to watch her most precious children. I mean her father-in-law saved $300 to pay for a horse he felt was special to him. Or how about she lets the person babysitting know that she would pay more if she had more but if they would be willing to take $15 to watch her precious children because it is all her family can afford then she would be grateful–if she had said that then maybe she would’ve received a hug instead of eye rolling. I think she looses me at implying “teenagers today are selfish and spoiled”–I’m sorry I have teenagers and they are people with busy lives–the world is very competitive and though they aren’t old enough for part time jobs, their school work is very consuming and we require them to do housework and they have to navigate this crazy world too. She should swallow her pride and let them know the “real reason” she’s paying so little for someone to care for her most precious children. And if she can afford more then I think she should pay more.
It is interesting to read all of these posts….. not one person has put this into perspective. How much do you pay your day time care provider?????? A mature, responsible, ADULT daycare provider that is CPR certified, state licensed, child care educated, follows state guidelines for food preparation, and provides a preschool program normally gets paid $35- $50 PER DAY!!!!! That is a 10-12 hour day OR on the high end $4.10 per hour ($50 for a 12 hour day). Most states are requiring day care providers to be educated in early childhood development and if you do not have a degree you are required to take thousands of dollars per year in licensing courses….
SO what A LOT of people are writing is they would rather pay a 15 year old $10 per hour to watch their kids, but in reality the teenager will sit on their cell phone texting with their friends while they stick a movie on and ignore the kids. When they pay the person during the day $4.10 per hour AND expect this person to have training, college degree and provide early childhood development.
I guess it does not make ANY sense… I agree 100% with only paying a kid max of $5 per hour and even then you are being generous. I think we have created a society of kids that think they are entitled to more than what is realistic!! $50 TO MOW A LAWN!!?!?!?!?! seriously??? It takes an hour to mow a lawn depending on the size…. look around you, how many people do YOU know that makes $50 an hour…. the ones I know have Masters level degrees or higher and are certainly not MOWING A LAWN to earn that $50.
I do not think this is about ANYONE being a cheapskate!! This is about perspective and parents allowing their children to think they are ENTITLED to earn the same amount as a Doctor for mowing a lawn. We will have a seriously rude awakening in 15 years when degrees and experience do not mean a thing. It is RIDICULOUS to pay a child the same amount of money you make to hang out while your child is in bed sleeping.
This comment! I have good friends who are child care professionals. They would die to make what most people pay baby sitters per hour. I once told my friend what I got sucked into paying a girl for watching my kid for 6 hours and she said that was more then she made for two days to watch 18 children. And she is 25 with a degree. And $50.00 to mow a lawn. If that’s the going rate I’m going to quit my job and start mowing lawns because that’s more then double what I make an hour to do a really difficult job 40 hours a week. Shit.. I’m going to get rich mowing lawns. Who needs a real job. Woohoo
This comment is insensitive. Nanny’s and child care workers cannot get the hours they need most of the time , don’t get ANY benefits (payed time off, insurance, etc) and provide one-on-one attention. They are expected to run errands and clean house. I’m sorry, but a daycare worker may get payed less and be obligated to pay taxes for their 40 hour a week job, but they also enjoy really nice benefits. I worked 26 hours a week as a nanny at 12/hr. I feel like it was fair because I had to pay my rent and bills on this. I worked EVERY holiday, except for Thanksgiving day and Christmas, and never took a day off because there was no one to cover for me. If I was sick, I usually got it from the children so the parents expected me to be there, feeling miserable while caring for poor, cranky, sick children. Daycare workers don’t have to deal with these things, PLUS they are dividing their attention between multiple kids. That’s why they get payed a little less per hour. I think this is totally fair. Before you make assumptions you should maybe talk to a professional nanny and try to learn some things.
Where are you from? People in Southern PA who meet the criteria you are mentioning are charging $30-$50 per HOUR not per day. MY wife and I sorted through DOZENS of babysitters and not one of them in our area was less than $8 per hour. I don’t know what people expect when people are watching their children. The less you pay kids in today’s society the less they will do. We “got rid” of several because we were paying them an hourly rate and they wouldn’t do ANYTHING but sit on the couch and make sure the kids didn’t die. I think its cheap and absurd to assume that since you were paid $2 per hour or $10 for an evening that in today’s world that same rate is acceptable. You have to remember you get what you pay for. If you pay $10 per hour then you will get $10 per hour of work if there are instructions on what is expected at that pay. Some people who are friends of friends I think get taken advantage of because they are friends. I do not think paying someone $10 per hour is too much. If you go out for an evening you pay that rate for someone to do your job.
AGREE!!
I fully agree!!!!
I only read your first paragraph and didn’t bother reading anymore. Your logic doesn’t make sense. If you’re sending your kid to daycare, they are making $50 a day from every child that attends, over a regular basis. Of course it’s less per hour than babysitting. That’s why people choose daycare centers over hiring a nanny. Plus their attention is split among all the children, rather than devoted only to your child/children. And a lot if daycares may be licensed and have qualified staff but more affordable care centers may not be. I get not paying an unreasonable amount to a 14 year old who is watching TV with your kids for a couple hours and playing on their smart phones when the children go to sleep, but I honestly think most sitters are more mature and responsible. Ten or twelve years ago when I was babysitting, I was earning about $10/hr which was fairly decent. But I was also asked to not let the children just watch tv all evening and to make a fairly simple dinner and clean up, and to keep their nighttime routine. Instead of paying teenagers a lousy amount of money and expect nothing from them, why don’t we set expectations high and pay them accordingly, show them we respect their responsibility. After all, we are leaving our most precious possessions in their care.
I am not referring to day care centers… I stated Day Care Provider… which would insinuate an In-Home Licensed Day Care… given that clarification, they do not get benefits, do not get the luxury of taking a day off, and have a set limit by the state as to how many children they can watch… typically 5 children… you do the math… 5 * 4.10/hour $20.50/per hour in case you can’t do the math…. my logic… you are on crack if you think a child should be paid as much as a LICENSED, CPR TRAINED, EDUCATED, day care provider…. I feel sorry any adult that gets stuck watching your children… apparently you put more stock in teenagers than grown trained adults… Congratulations!
Suzanne, I think your comment is ignorant and I am thankful that no one will have to worry about you watching their children. She isn’t more concerned with her money than her children…parents need some time away from their kids sometimes, but money is tight for everyone. Nothing she said implied that she’s not appreciative of those that watch her kids, simply that a teenager can’t expect to make an absurd amount of money for babysitting two kids. My husband and I get a sitter ONCE a year, because we can’t justify the expense any other time of year….because all of our extra money goes towards doing things with out children. So, that once a year, I AM concerned with how much it may cost me to hire a sitter, and I don’t pay them more than I feel they should get.
Amen to that Suzanne! I always got paid at least $20-40 for a night of babysitting as teenager and that was in the 1990’s. And I completely agree about the behaviour of children, even good kids want a lot of attention and they usually wanted to be entertained by me rather than a movie. Now as a Mom of three kids I will pay $10 an hour. That’s how much “drop-off” babysitting is per hour/per child. So we usually spend $40 on babysitting for date night and we agree it’s money well spent. If you’re harping on “kids these days” then you are well on your way to becoming the neighborhood grump. But then again, cheapskates usually are.
Wow that is a bit harsh! I didn’t feel that she valued her money more than her children. When I used to babysit I would work hard as well…bringing entertainment(not movies) for kids, cooking dinner, cleaning up house, playing with kids ect. I agree with you that it could be exhausting! Now babysitters just come and put on movie after movie for the kids so I agree with the post that most of these babysitters don’t earn their money. However I think this writer deserves respect whether you agree with her post or not.
Wow, Suzanne! That was a bit harsh. It is not about caring more for her money than her kids. That is simply ridiculous. Not everyone has a fat bank account and can afford to pay the crazy prices that many sitters charge. I have paid a babysitter twice to watch my daughter in the 7 years she has been alive. The first one was a predetermined amount’ set by the sitter, that equaled $4/hr. The 2nd one, just last year, was a teenager who was staying with my best friend, as a favor. She asked for $10/hr and she only watched my child for 2 hours before putting her in bed, then she sat and watched tv and talked on the phone. I love my daughter more than life, there is NOTHING more important than her. It’s not that our money is more important, it’s not. But why pay more than what the job is worth? How about next time you go to your mechanic to get your car fixed, you give them an extra $100… even though they didn’t earn it. Maybe next time you can use some manners when judging someone… which you really shouldn’t be doing in the 1st place.
Times have changed. In 1965, I was paid 35 cents an hour to babysit. If I was lucky, sometimes I got 50 cents.
In 1996 i got $2 an hour for 4 roudy boys under the age of 6.
Wow! You are kind of a cheapskate. 20 years ago, I made $10 mowing a lawn that took me a an hour and a half. 5 an hour was pretty fair for babysitting a few kids. It cost just under $5 to go to a movie back then. I remember buying penny candies in the early 90s. Heck, as a kid I could buy a candybar from a vending maching for 50 cents. Now they often go for $1.50. I support 3 going on 4 kids with one meager income, but I still manage to pay the sweet girl that watches our kids 10 an hour. I’m sure you could find a way to do it as well. We know our kids are in good hands when she watches them and that peace of mind is worth something. I don’t agree with taking advantage of kids just because they are kids. Sorry. Kids are people too and deserve at least a little respect.
so you pay $10 an hour for FOUR kids? She stated in her article, she paid $15 an hour for 2 kids. Who is the cheapskate? Do the math please, because unless you pay $10 an hour for each kid, you pay less than she does.
Allright, correction, 3 kids. The math still doesn’t add up.
sigh fact check again…15 for 3 hrs. can I delete all my comments now? lol
lol… I’ve done that too! 🙂 But if you think about it – $15 for 3 hours is still $5 dollars an hour for TWO kids and Mike T. pays $10 an hour for FOUR kids… so same price. AND she says she pays more for extra work… So I agree with you Raynelle – who’s the cheapskate that Mike T. is referring to?
Uh Nicole your math is still wrong It would be $5/hr=$15. She pays $2.50 per kid per hour. He has three kids (one on the way–therefore doesn’t constitute a baby to babysit) which equals $3.33 or so per kid per hour. Besides $10 an hour is very good considering what minimum wage is–more than $5 an hour that’s for sure! I like the part where she says “if the sitter saves the kids from a housefire” she’ll pay extra—oh and the part where her father in law saved $300 for a horse when he was 11. Really? Are those even realistic expectations for teenagers in this day and age? In the world I live in I’m paying a person whom I trust to watch over the most precious things in my life–if my kids aren’t staying with family then I’ll pay a good wage because my KIDS are WORTH it–I don’t ask just any old teenager to babysit. They must be trustworthy, responsible, kind, patient and have good morals–things I’ll pay a pretty penny for so I know my kids have a nice evening as well.
If you think about it $10 an hour is still a lot because my husband made only $2/hr more doing a full time job to provide for all three of us (myself,him and our child). They don’t need $10 because babysitting for young men and women is not a full time job and they only have to worry about providing for themselves and even then they are still living with parents so they don’t even have to provide for themselves fully. They can survive on less than $10 an hr. And as I stated in another post you can only do what you can afford. It’s that simple. So their is no need to call anyone a cheapskate unless we want to call the poor widow from the story in the bible about the widows mite a cheapskate for putting very little in the offering bowl when it was all she had and I don’t think it is appropriate to do that. It was all she had even though it was little little.
When I was a teen (25 yrs ago) I never charged a certain amount. I would tell the parents “whatever they could afford” was good enough. Sometimes I only got a few bucks per night per kid, but one time (probably tax time) I got paid $10/hr per kid from the same family that usually only gave me $0.50-1.00/hr/kid. They could afford more that night, so I got more.
I still babysit for friends – I currently help a single mom with her 8 month old little girl so she can work. I have her 10 hours a day and only get about $18/day, because that is all she can afford. Normally, I ask for only $20/day per kid for the 8-12 hour day they are with me. ($15 if less than 8 hours) So I, as an adult, am making less than $2/hour per kid and rarely have more than 2 kids at a time. Does it pay well, NO! But I am helping young people by providing a safe place for their child without taking all of their money. I don’t have a lot to put in the offering plate, but I can give my time to help others.
I made 7 bucks an hour babysitting almost 20 years ago. I made 15 bucks an hour babysitting 10 years ago. I honestly think there is something wrong with a society that will pay more for a cleaning lady to come twice a month than they would for someone to keep their kids safe for a few hours. That being said, I think there is a sense of entitlement now that wasn’t present when I babysat my way through university in 2003–for the 15 bucks an hour I DID make dinner, keep the house in the state it was in when the parents left (and sometimes cleaner) and help out by folding laundry while watching TV after the kids had gone to bed. I also ate their food, used their internet and enjoyed their nice houses. It was a win-win situation. But I don’t think the situation is to lower the pay. It says a lot about the worth you place on your family when you’ll pay 20-30 bucks an hour to have your toilets cleaned but you don’t want to pay 10 to have your kids kept happy for a few hours.
The dollar isn’t worth very much today as it used to be.
I thought that her only example was dramatic – she compared her paying $15 for 3 hours to a $50 lawn-mowing job (and hopefully she is beginning to discover the cheaply nature of many LDS – esp. Utah LDS – members). I think that while $50 may be exorbitant, something like $21-25 for 3 hours is much fairer and in-touch with financial reality – money isn’t worth what it used to be, so we have to pay more.
While there is an entitlement problem today, this blogger creates a logical fallacy with her link and comparison to olden-day payments, etc. Money was worth more back then.
Also, this blogger seems a little disconnected with the responsibilities of baby-sitting. While baby-sitting may go smoothly, there is never a guarantee, and the baby-sitter is taking upon her/himself that risk. The babysitter is responsible for the children during that time. Something could happen, and that responsibility must be paid in cash. Paying a minimum wage for the time is the least that someone should pay.
Beyond that, I think she made good points about a babysitter actually doing things. Anytime anyone is hired for a job, they ought to do the job.
“money isn’t worth what it used to be, so we have to pay more.”
That’s why she linked the wage to the price of movie tickets. (Because movie tickets track with inflation and higher-cost-of-living areas.)
Plus her point wasn’t that we should all pay X amount. It was that paying more than the babysitting is worth generates poor quality babysitting and unrealistic expectations for the babysitters in their eventual work life.
Unfortunately, paying less than what it is worth, will also produce low quality babysitting. It’s not about low-balling and it’s not about over-paying, it’s about finding that common ground. I find this article hard to swallow, as her opinions seem to be the basis for paying so low. If she can’t afford it, then that’s honorable. But she goes beyond the fact that she can’t afford to pay more, and turns it into her roaring opinions as justification to underpay a sitter.
I am a little surprised at why this article is so full of controversy.
I finished reading this article, nodded my head a little and though “Hm, it’s true that I only ever have my mother babysit or my sister-in-law.”
The only thing I really want is 2-3 hours with my husband.
I think a lot of the people responding to this need to understand what 10$ an hour is to a 40,000 a year income. Go on a 3 hour date which is what…barely a movie at best? and you are dropping 30$ on a babysitter who, like the OP basically insinuates leaves your house trashed and your kids not well taken care of.
So basically you call the neighborhood teen who is 14 ish, they’re snotty about getting less than 10 bucks an hour — (you know this kids really well, like REALLY well) have them watch a movie with your kid, have them give your child a meal that you made, then you get to come home and clean up the mess anyway.
You go on a 5 hour date ( travel time, dinner and a movie) Spend $30 on dinner, $20 on a movie then come home and spend another $50 on the babysitter. Notice how she mentioned the saggy diaper? I am guessing there may have been something to prompt this?
So you go in to sleep, find that your baby is soaked 1/2 way through the night, change everything and the next morning write something like she did having dropped $100 on cleaning your own house and not getting any action because you cleaned up urine instead.
Sound familiar now?
OR you can just call in a favor from a friend.
I think she has a point ON TOP of the point above which is: Do people think this is going to fly in the real world? Creating a monopoly on a ‘salary’ for a terrible job because SHE COMES FROM A CULTURE OF NEUROTIC PEOPLE. It’s like a Jew making a Jew joke. I can say that.
I have been in her exact position. My kids, I have two girls, are literally the easiest, nicest, sweetest things in the world. No mess or trouble.
I think she gave great tips: Set a price and expectation. This IS a job, you ARE paying for it. This isn’t daycare she’s talking about people. Think of it like 50’s neighborhood sitting. You don’t ask a teen to watch your kids long term. All the people going nuts over it like that are the creepy immoral weird stupid ones. It’s just a few hours for the Jones’ down the street on a Friday night, and you should leave their house nice.
I don’t understand what about this concept is “creepy and weird”: If you expect a good babysitter, you should be willing to pay for a good babysitter. If you can’t afford a good one, then you either deal with who’s willing to work for 15 dollars a night (younger kids, or kids who aren’t in high demand because of their skill). I don’t understand why people don’t get that this is PURE economics and holds to any other industry. I would love to teach my daughters that if they work really hard and are the best at what they do people will pay a premium for their services and they will never want for work. I think that’s a good lesson. That’s just me though. People may disagree.
Seems to me that people need to find new sitters. My 14 year old daughter would never leave a child in a saggy diaper, a house a mess, or any of the above stated comments. She’s actually a sweet girl who would babysit for free, if the person truly needed that. A person shouldn’t base their pay on a horrible experience. That’s judgmental and quite frankly, a scapegoat to underpay a sitter. You wouldn’t want someone to judge you based on their past experiences with something that had nothing to do with you, why do that to someone else…
When I was a young babysitter, I was paid 25 cents per hour, when I was paid at all. In my church, we were expected to do service hours for people and this often took the form of babysitting. Parents, in my opinion, took pretty serious advantage of the girls who were kind enough to perform this service. They sometimes left for the entire day without leaving food for their kids, let alone the sitter. I sometimes had to call my mom to bring something for the poor little kids to eat. I finally quit babysitting and took up ironing to earn money. Paying a sitter $2 to clean your house is ridiculous and if I were them, I wouldn’t do it.
Just like anything else, if you want to get the best babysitters, you have to pay them a competitive wage. I agree they shouldn’t be paid 15 or 20 hour, but make it fair and reasonable.
I babysat a ton! I worked hard; changed plenty of diapers, occasionally some throw up, played with and read to the kids, fed them, sang & told them stories if I needed to put them to bed and I tried to clean if there was time and it needed it. I didn’t have a going rate. I gratefully took what was offered. I love kids and now have my own. I graduated from hs in 2000, and I never made even $40. I knew, even then, that many people need to get out but can’t afford much. I also had people pay me in crafty things, music lessons and so on. We can’t afford to go out much, but when we are able to, I hope to find a sitter along the same lines as I was.
I’m a mormon and I have no idea why the lds culture is so cheap in these situations. It makes us look bad! I’m all about being reasonable, but I earned 5 dollars an hour when I was a babysitter–15 YEARS ago. It was considered stingy back then. One time I babysat for my sister-in-law’s brother. He was very wealthy and literally lived in a mansion. I watched his 10 kids for five hours and he handed me five bucks at the end of the night. One dollar an hour for 10 kids, all about a year apart. I understand the part about being reasonable and not setting up unrealistic expectations, but you are entrusting your precious children with someone and you won’t pay them more than you’re willing to hand over to a restaurant for serving your dinner. I’m sorry, but that’s kind of wrong. Last year I quit my job to go back to school and worked part time as a nanny for 12 bucks an hour. I love those kids like my own and I think I’m worth every penny. I’m not saying kids should earn that much, but you should be willing to sacrifice a little for someone you trust with your children
Well said! I completely agree!
Totally agree with you!
Thank you! You put into words what I have tried to tell others how I feel about babysitters. I am sharing this and using your suggestions when hiring a sitter. Lay it all out there, how much I will pay and what I expect from them. Again thank you! You gained a reader!
In my opinion you are very lucky that your sitter agreed to the job. I would have kindly declined. In addition I would like to add that I am a responsible adult that views babysitting/nannying as a very serious job. I do not change my behavior based on what the parents “expect of me.” If I am hired as a babysitter 10/10 times you will come home to a clean house, dishes put away, kids in bed, laundry folded, clean rooms, etc. Not to mention helping with homework, bath time, bedtime stories, playing outside, making dinner, etc. On top of that, I treat the children I babysit as if they were my own. I am caring, loving, and go above and beyond “just sitting and watching a show.” The families I work for trust me wholeheartedly with their children (the most important people in their lives) and I take pride in the connections and care that I give to these children.
Here is an example that proves your theory of paying a babysitter untrue and quite ridiculous: Going out for coffee for me is a luxury. I can make it at home for what, like 15 cents a cup? I am on a budget, and believe that the price for a cup of Starbucks in the morning is quite ridiculous. That being said, when I indulge in this luxury I pay the required (normal) amount for a cup of coffee at Starbucks or Coffee Bean not only because that is how much a cup of coffee costs today, but because I made the choice to go out and get a cup instead of making it at home. What you are trying to say is that a babysitter’s pay is the sole choice of the family they are working for. That you have the power to decide what her time is worth, and she has no say in the matter. That is preposterous. You made the choice to have a sitter, and being on a budget is no excuse to pay your sitter poorly for “a job that is not difficult.” When you choose to have a babysitter, like choosing to get your coffee at Starbucks instead of making it at home, you must pay the average price.
“Excuse me sir, but I saw you make my coffee, and it didn’t seem like you put any extra effort into it, so I’m only going to pay $1.50 instead of $3. Thank you!” Let’s see how well that goes over.
It seems to me that this article is searching for validation of a decade old tradition of treating a babysitter like a common dog walker, or house sitter. These are your CHILDREN I am taking care of, and I expect to be treated as a professional seeing that I have two teaching credentials, a minor in child development, am CPR certified, have taken babysitting classes, and have about 12 years of experience with taking care of children.
As a babysitter I have a minimum pay. If you would like my services it will cost you $10 an hour for two to four children. If you choose to pay me extra, that is a choice you make, but I will not be taken advantage of and paid a meager $5 an hour or less to take care of the children that you think are angles, that are most likely not. If you are having a problem with babysitters that don’t do anything, then you need to choose a more capable sitter, or describe what you expect of them. If they do not deliver, well then… for the price you are paying you deserve to have a sitter you trust and who does the job you expect. Don’t ask them back. Simple as that. None of that excuses you to decide for your sitter what their rate is going to be. That being said, if someone’s minimum is too high for you, then so be it. You will need to find someone else.
I am a part of the families I work for. I attend birthday parties, girl scout meetings, take them to gymnastics and basketball practice, make cookies for them, and help out at their schools. I am a role model and someone to look up to for these children even if it is as an occasional sitter. My point is, the families I work for take care of me, and I take care of them.
Excellent comments. I wish I could have said it as good!
Given here … you’re not a young teenager; you’re “trained”; you take this “job” beyond what was outlined. At that point, when the offer was made prior to your accepting the job, you could have politely said “no”.
You’re an adult! She’s talking about teenagers, specifically teenagers who aren’t old enough to get real jobs. It’s completely different.
You are an adult. You have the experience and education. We are talking teenagers not nannies not daycare. Someone to come watch the kids while they sleep while I go to dinner or a movie. I’m sorry but I’m not paying a teenager more money then my husband makes per hour. What she is saying is that teenagers should not more money then people who work at fast food for a couple hours. This is why I cannot go out on a date with my spouse. He makes $15 an hour they take out taxes and insurance. We pay rent bills car insurance. Teenagers don’t have to. I can make $20 an hour when I’m done with my master’s degree $45 but I hace two degrees working on three. They haven’t even graduated high school.
All you guys want to assume that teens don’t have bills to pay. Let’s face it, some, actually many, do. Many teens have had to grow up way before their time, helping their family out. Perhaps it may not always be a bill that the teen is paying for, but rather saving up money for something bigger that her parent’s can’t afford. Or buying their own clothes and personal items so their parents’ can afford food or gas for that week. People want to talk about what they, as adults can or can’t afford, yet, these adults are someone’s parents. These kids, of the parents who can’t afford much, could be the very kids that people want to low-ball on jobs. If the article was written on a perspective of “I can’t afford much, this is what I can do,” that’d be one thing. But instead, the author uses her opinions of teenagers to try to justify her paying them so little. That I can’t respect. Because while she’s sitting there judging a teen based on her perception, she could be denying them the very things they need, because she wants to teach them life lessons. Some teens have had more life lessons than they should ever know.
oh i just realized you are from utah. i lived there for over a decade. explains why you are so judgemental and cheap. its not your fault, its the LDS culture. Im sorry my previous comment called you ignorant, its a utah thing, just how mormons are.
Wow. What a condescending attitude!
but true. even the utah people agree. sorry it is what it is.
For those bringing up religion what does that have to do with the price of paying a babysitter? I’m pretty sure EVERY religion has people that are cheap (Jan not calling you cheap). Also to those saying that teens aren’t entitled these days and sticking up for their precious children who shouldn’t possibly get paid that little amount of money for babysitting are making the teens entitled right there, you’re doing the damage yourself!
my 16 year old pays for her own ballet lessons, her own drum corp. fees (thats over 3,000 right there) her own winterguard fees, her own clothes mostly plus she gets good grades, doesnt drink or smoke and has a babysitting waiting list for her services. she makes 10.00 an hour for one kid 5.00 for each additional kid. will not watch kids under 12 months and if your kids are not potty trained she charges an extra amount. she also makes pizzas for 8.95 an hour plus tips. has a savings account and pays her tithe. i think the only thing that gorl feels entitled to is a nap.
oh and she also sells on etsy. she does pay taxes for etsy and pizza, not for babysitting though.
my 19 year old does things differently but she no longer lives at home and has a job. when she babysat i think it was for 10 an hour.
We’re not saying it’s a religious thing. I’m a mormon and grew up outside of utah. I have babysat here in utah, in ohio, and in Oregon. Utah mormon families are NOTORIOUS for paying babysitters poorly and not being good tippers (or sometimes even tipping AT ALL). There are many wonderful, charitable, friendly people in this state, but they tend to be stingy about some things that, in my experience, people in other states aren’t. It’s a cultural thing, not a religious one. Like bad driving 🙂 The church is still true here, even though a waitress only gets a 2 dollar tip for dealing with a rowdy family of 8 for two hours!
So true! The good people of Utah are horrible at tipping and paying a minimum wage amount to services done in the home. I wonder why that is, because they are very hard working people.
we ran 3 restaurants there. and this is the facts, call me out i dont care but this is how it is.
1. people of utah are BAD tippers. remember you only make service wage which was 2.13 an hour when i lived there. if you gratted yourself 15% because your party of 7 was there for 3 hours taking up time and space, they got irate.
2. please dont yell at me, but the kids we fired for being lazy were always LDS. so maybe the issue with your babysitters not being worth more than a few bucks an hour starts with you. teach your lazy kids to get off their ass, be on time, and give it 100%. i mean this article referred to kids as lazy and pathetic, if that is what society and parents think of you, you have a good chance of never being anything but lazy and pathetic.
the hispanic community in utah worked so hard for us. taught me a thing or two for sure.
3. your children are the most precious thing God ever gave you. leaving them with someone who you feel is only worth 5.00 an hour because they really arent doing much anyway, is negligent.
if you cant afford a decent babysitter, you cant afford to go out.
Hilarious and so true!! I was thinking to myself, tipping on top of paying!?! What is this!? Also love the stereotype hit it on the nose! To funny! But like you said not religious just cultural. .
Unfortunately, I find that Mormons take advantage of each other sometimes. Like wanting free or reduced services when another member is a professional. My husband and I (Mormons also) are the opposite! We don’t want to take advantage of anyone because we know how it leaves us feeling. When I lived in Utah, yes, this was the case unfortunately. Regardless of the reasoning, it is a good idea to let the babysitter know of the expectations beforehand and what she/he will be paid. I was so shy that I would resent being given 4 kids instead of 2 and being paid far less than what I should have been one of the times I babysat. Had I known my pay and expectations beforehand, I could have gone into the job without a big question mark.
Is it ironic that my husband owns a landscape maintenance company and we have young children? In our area a “professional” babysitter charges $15 for two kids. I’ll tell you, I get a lot better job from the church friend I pay $10. I really appreciated the idea of giving a sitter commission. As in offering a base rate and letting them know what they could do to increase their pay.
My husband charges $35-40 per hour depending upon his job, but he files his taxes and pays dearly for the joy of being self-employed (that is about to go up), not to mention insurance, etc. Most babysitters are not paying taxes or declaring that income and some college age sitters may even be receiving food stamps. I agree with the original post that children need to learn to earn their wages. People who disagree with that fine, but personal attacks on the blogger not that’s just juvenile.
Just read your newer post (“In Defense of Jan”) and wanted to comment that after reading this post earlier today and agreeing wholeheartedly, I went to a RS activity tonight where the article was brought up. Everyone that had read it (4 of us) completely agreed and were happy that someone was bringing up the subject of what to pay the babysitter. Also, I was finally able to prove to my husband that the $10/hour he originally wanted to pay our first babysitter to watch one child was RIDICULOUS and even the $7/hour that we compromised on was very generous. I made $3/hour watching 2 kids in the mid-90s (which was my only reference) and I always left the house cleaner than when I arrived. We just moved across the country and I will feel much better about sticking to my guns when paying our new babysitters for what they are doing, not what I think they expect. Thank you!
I wouldn’t let my teenager babysit for you for $5 an hour. I was making almost that much 30 years ago! I remember being a young parent with little money. We didn’t go out much because we couldn’t afford going out and paying for a babysitter. I did pay my babysitter well when we did go out. I found good sitters and wanted to make it worth their time to keep coming back. They could have made more working other places for sure. Remember you get what you pay for! I didn’t want twelve year old kids caring for my children. I’m afraid that’s what you would get for $5 an hour. Your way of figuring pay is (sorry) ridiculous. You set the rate and expectations and pay them. If they did a good job you ask them back if not don’t use them again. That’s how most jobs work. Your perspective on this will probably change as your children get older. You clearly don’t have a realistic view of the expenses teenagers have. I’m not talking about leisure activities. Sometime check out school fees and car insurance. By the way, most teenagers aren’t driving because they’re lazy and want their parents to drive them. It’s because it cost hundreds of dollars to even take drivers training not to mention the insurance once you get the license. When I was a kid, drivers training was free and I paid in six months what it costs my son in one month for insurance. Do you honestly think a teenager would rather have their parent drive them around? You are completely out of touch. Quite being cheap, pay up or stay home.
No babysitter should be paid less than minimum wage. I would never spend 5 hours with a family of four kids on a Saturday night for only $25. That will get me less than half a tank of gas. Maybe $5 an hour works for 12 year old naive babysitters, but that would never fly with me. Good luck finding a decent babysitter and only paying them $5 an hour. I guarantee the job will be mediocre at best.
Hey Jan. Don’t let the h8ters get you down. It baffles me why people who are the nicest people in the world in person feel that they can name-call and say nasty things when lurking on the internet. And it doesn’t matter what the subject is. You could be talking about puppies and Christmas and they will turn it into something absurd. So just ignore those people. They are kind of like the mosquitoes of life…..annoying but part of the Internet experience.
As to your babysitting thesis, I couldn’t agree more on your comments. I have raised my kids with the same expectations on money which is that you should be working hard for it. And BTW, my 18 year old son just got a job at a pizza place where he makes a grand total of $8/hr. So when compared to standing in the back making pizzas for $8/hr, $5/hr for a 13-16 year old kid to watch TV with a child sounds about right. I do like the extra pay for extra work idea too.
So keep your chin up high. You have a TON of supporters out here. I find your posts insightful and I find myself agreeing with your viewpoint, especially on the Gay issue. Thanks for helping others clarify their own view and feelings through your posts! You go girl!
I am a an experienced babysitter from Austria and without any judgement I wouldnt watch three kids for 5$ an hour.
If it was one kid okay… But three?
I used to watch twins( 6 months) and a little boy of 2 years. I earned 8€ during daytime and 5€ during night time
It was okay for me but I really often felt underpaid.
Parents excpect babysitters to feel responsible and take good care. If something happens to one of the children the babysitter is still responsible. He/She might even get in a situation of total uncontrol ( when children suddenly get a fever, or falls down the stairs or hurts themself in the garden playing).
I think its true what you said about expectations. If I would get 5$ for three kids an hour I wouldnt really much care about the children. I would do my job but thats all! I wouldnt put much effort in playing, or bedtime stories or whatever.
Maybe thats because I’m already 22 and I already have a job, but you definitely cant pay a babysitter 5$ an hour and then be mad when you come home and everything’s a mess.
I think mothers sometimes forget that for them being a mom is natural, it is hard work and they dont get paid for it for a simple reason… Because they chose to be a mom. I’m 22 and will one day too be a mom but right now I dont want to be and thats the work I get paid for because I obviously didnt chose it. For a mom to clean dirty diapers is something different than for a babysitter, for a mum to soothe a crying child is so much different than for a babysitter. It’s only a job to them. (Of course you start caring if you do it regulary, or you babsitt your family)
I’m glad you were never my sitter. And now you’re a worldly 22. Again, she said she sets expectations beforehand and the sitter can refuse. You seem to be part of the entitlement generation and hopefully will have your eyes opened when you actually become a responsible adult with children.
rabea made some very sound comments. it is absolutely a lot more stress for a teen to soothe babies and change diapers…
everyone is throwing around the entitlement word. entitlement means everyone gets a prize even if you didnt win. you all get a bouncy ball from the dentist regardless if you had no cavities or 5 cavities. entitlement means you expect something for nothing.
your kid bites, refuses to eat, throws food, will not stay in bed, wont do his home work, hides your purse, remember even the best of kids for mom will see how far they can push the limits of a babysitter.
maybe entitlement is expecting to not pay a decent wage because you chose to have 5 kids you cannot afford and you feel that you are justified in that respect.
Thanks for your lovely reply Rabea. You make very good points, like this person babysitting is in charge of human beings and if anything happens to that child the sitter is ultimately responsible. Your comment did not seem like you have a sense of “entitlement” like suggested by DadOf5. You are very realistic with your opinions. Thanks for sharing! And by the way I am a MomOf5 to put my thoughts in perspective.
I didn’t read all the comments, but I think a VERY important part is explained that she tells her potential sitter UP FRONT how much money she’ll pay and her expectations. The sitter can make up their own mind if they want to accept the job or not, much like we adults in the ‘real job’ market. If we think we’re worth more we don’t take the lower paying job. Generally these sitters are not paying for their own living expenses, and this is tax free money. A minimum wage job, after taxes and FICA is going to pay far less than $10 an hour. What kind of work ethic do we create for them? When they get to a real job they will be angry that they don’t make much and likely shirk their duties and whine all the time. They will quit without notice and cause the business to need to train a new employee, thus raising costs and in turn our prices. Sadly we have raised our kids into an entitlement world.
They aren’t paying taxes, but this isn’t a full-time gig. Why are we putting all the onus on these babysitters? If they can make $10+ an hour, more power to them. It would be silly to take less just on principle. I think there is a lot of entitlement out there, but I am far lass concerned for any of these babysitters, constructively participating in and contributing to society, than I am for the far greater bulk of future institutional takers. A teenager who will work for any amount of money should be encouraged and supported. Demanding cheap or free babysitting for the kids you chose to have of your own free will is not without its own entitlement implications.
agreed
and it really bothered me the OP talks like it is HER RESPONSIBILITY to teach the babysitter (that is not her child) the true value of money and responsible work ethics.
when i showed this to my girls, separately, they BOTH said along the lines
if you only go out twice a year then you have six month intervals to budget for a night of babysitting.
setting aside 1.50 a week for 6 months maybe would help you pay for a sitter that isnt too much of a dumb ass to change a friggen diaper?
You know, not all babysitters are the same. If I know someone will do the bare minimum, but will keep my kids safe, then that I would not be willing to pay that person as much as I would someone I know who will be in a good mood with my kids, interact with them, clean up a little. It’s real life. My husband is self-employed. The ones who get the raises are the ones who are simply better workers and more respectful on their own initiative. He’s had ones who text, email and do the bare minimum and others who go above and beyond and treat him respectfully. When he’s thinking of pay raises or Christmas bonuses, it’s only logical that the more dedicated worker will fare better. Same with babysitters.
If it’s truly a matter of the parents’ not being able to afford a decent pay, then still let the babysitter know a few days beforehand so she/he can make a choice. My daughter’s been willing to help people out. But no one, not the parent nor the babysitter, wants to be taken advantage of.
Simply put one being LDS has no baring on babysitting….. Second let me just say this to you all…. That babysitter your putting down and saying isnt worth your money is the one that takes care and protects your child or children while you are gone. You ever looked up nanny cams and seen how some babysitters treat kids??? You get what you pay for….. You pay someone cheaply for protecting your child while you are out getting a break don’t cry when the house catches fire and that babysitter forgets to grab your children because simply they are under paid children themselves. No one under 16 babysits my 4 children. They must be update with their CPR certification. They must have their own transportation whether it be mom or they have a car. They need to be “mom” in my place while i am out. I pay my sitter $11.00 an hr + $20.00 for every load of laundry she does. My babysitter cleans my house and she cooks and I pay her extra for that because its not her responsibility to fold laundry or clean for me because I was to lazy to do it before she arrived for my date night! This isn’t hate that i am speaking its common sense! That car I require take money for gas and insurance, that CPR cert requires her time and her payment out of her own pocket. The laundry is simply because I don’t wanna do it so it a favor in which I owe her for same as cleaning. I also pay my babysitter and extra $10.00 an hr for every hr I go over past the time I tell her I will be home which almost happens every time we go out cause my husband is slow. I pay her well why because she is the only person that will save my kids life if something horrific happens while I am gone…… I owe her for being their protector while I am out having “fun”!
For many families paying out $50+ for a sitter for a few hours is impossible. For many families that is over half a days wages after taxes and insurance. It’s difficult enough to take the time away from your kids and spend some money in a way which can be quite frivolous and seemingly wasteful for a family struggling to put food on the table.
This is a great article! I completely agree and I always ask the babysitter I she accepts my payment amount before I let her accept the job. It works out great! Thanks for your articulate and helpful explanations:)
Everyone who keeps saying the author is cheap because she doesn’t want to pay a 13yo $10+ an hour to sit around and make sure the house doesn’t catch on fire is ridiculous. The people who keep saying the author is cheap because she is only willing to pay again a 13yo to care for her most precious ones by sitting on a couch and watching a movie are ridiculous. The people who never even completely read this post because you were so outraged because you are a 20 something entitled (someone should have paid you less as a babysitter) selfish, rude college graduate who does this professionally, whom I would never let watch my precious ones for the ridiculous $20/hr even if you are gods gift to children. What happened to people!!?? What happened to doing something nice or the right thing without receiving as much money as you could get??!! I also babysat at 13 and I played with the kids, 3 of them ages 5,3,and 2 made dinner, put them to bed, cleaned, and when i was done I did homework not turned the TV on. I made $20 a night anywhere between 4-7 hours. Why the hell does your 13 year old need $10+ an hour??? What are they buying with that money?! That is just outrageous to pay more than $5-$7 an hour for 11-13 yo and $7-10 for 14-17 in my opinion. They don’t pay taxes, or social security or rent?! Oh wow they help pay a cell phone bill and car insurance what happened to riding the city bus?? I don’t think all teenagers are ungrateful, entitled brats, but some of them are, and it seems more and more each year. To think you would pay a babysitter or as a babysitter expect $20 an hour when our service men and women who are protecting this country with their lives make less then that makes me sick.
There are so many things wrong with this but I’ll just point out a two. First of all your assumption that your children are well behaved. Perhaps they are well behaved for you but what about the sitter – My daughter has sat for plenty of folks who think their kids are angels but I’ve had to go rescue her from tough situations. Babysitters, like all workers, should be paid at least the state minimum wage. Second regarding the story of her father in law… Who in their right mind sells a horse to an 11 year old, what Bishop goes against the wishes of the parents and helps the child disobey – REALLY? I’m not impressed by that.
First of all the parents said no about the horse because they didn’t have any place to put it. But the young man found a place and raised the money himself to pay for everything. Very impressive for an 11 year old when today 11 year olds are not that motivated and get just about everything handed to them.
The only thing I disagreed with totally is bringing up the unemployment rate. Some kids are not allowed to work, to leave their focus on school. And given that even places like McDonald’s and its ilk are hiring adults with degrees, it’s much harder for teens to get jobs. Companies are more willing to hire someone who doesn’t have to work around a school schedule, or have a legal maximum of hours they can work.
I have some quibbles with the rest of it, but I definitely see good points.
REALLY? Four kids ages 6 to 1?!! Five dollars an hour?! That’s ALOT of very young children! I don’t care how ‘sweet and magical’ your children are! That is not easy for a teenager! When I was babysitting ten years ago I lived in a poorer neighborhood and that is less than they were paying me to babysit!
Babysitting is hard. I don’t care how nice your kids are, when you leave the house most of the time they go a little crazy. And things you think are normal for your family aren’t normal for others. Really as a parent you should know by now that other people won’t be able to handle you children as well as you. They also aren’t going to like your children as much as you do.
I’m sorry but babysitting does not really look that awesome on a resume, even for a teen. It sure didn’t help me or my friends get jobs as a teenager. College is also expensive now, have you heard? How do you guys keep expecting us to pay for it, to save for it? Especially if your paying us 5 dollars an hour? (And I know your LDS but the majority of us non-LDS can’t get into a cheap school like BYU)
Sorry honey, it’s not them, it’s you.
Non-lds can to attend byu, just apply like lds do.
I totally agree with you. Most of my kids are teenagers, I’ve had to tell the families my kids babysit for that they gets &4-$5 an hour, Maxx! Often I’ve made them return money when they have been paid $8 or more per hour. I don’t think they learn what is realistic in the world. Most jobs are not throwing money at you for playing with kids and watching movies. They need to learn a good work ethic, something that is missing all to often in out young adults. I always tell the moms to have them back to make up the difference in what they usually pay. Someone tried to pay my son $200 for about 12 hours of yard work. I made him return it and allowed him to take $125, still seemed like a lot to me. Making money takes work in the real works.
I have been a nanny, I have babysat, I have worked in daycare and now I have 4 children of my own. I have been paid best by working in daycare, at $8 an hr. I love children and I know I wont get rich in this field, but I have a great time and I love giving peace of mind to the parents by letting them know their children are in capable and loving hands. I wont dispute that I may not have liked my pay sometimes, but I always loved the job. However, due to this generations greed (and their parents enabling), I am unable to afford a sitter myself so that my husband and I can even get out for a night. Perhaps in a few more years my children will be old enough to stay home by themselves and then we can at least get dinner out alone.
What if it doesn’t go smoothly for them, are you going to pay them extra? Every parent thinks their kids are easy enough for a sitter to take care of, but that is not normally the case. And you say you would pay extra if they did other things like clean your house. So if your sitter feeds them their premade dinner and leaves the mess on the table, or the kids get out toys and the sitter leaves them on the floor, you’d be perfectly willing to accept that and just say hey, it’s ok because it wasn’t in my expectations? Because if you lay out your expectations like that all on the table, then they will tell you that you weren’t expected to clean up because you paid them such a small fee and didn’t put it in the expectations. You say they have an entitled attitude…well I daresay you have the same.
First of all, you seem a little obsessed over this “movie ticket” thing. Are you under the impression that what teenagers do with their time is to simply goof off and “go to movies”?? I feel like your selection of teenagers must be sadly limited, if indeed you have even ever met one. There is the occasional lazy kid who, understandably enough, chooses not to work or for some reason had no need to. And they just go to movies. I am 22 years old, and this type of teenager is worth skipping over as an outlier in your cute little “study” since such a person will not be the one you end up employing anyway. The vast majority of 14 and older teenagers who actually did these two jobs–babysitting and mowing lawns–were not thinking of going to watch the latest movie; rather, that seems to be, to use your words, an “in my day” thought process you are forcing on this generation, as evidenced by your stories in the latter half of the article. No, the most common phrase was “I’m saving for college.” You forget: this is a generation raised not under the paradigm of “if you go to college got will get a job;” we have been raised with words like “recession” which we hadn’t a clue what it meant and “college makes you more likely to get a good job.” In our current job atmosphere, it’s not even a guarantee. It’s a solid bet that at least one of your parents is unemployed and, as much as everyone scoffs at the idea, we are actually being raised with an incredibly high work ethic, because otherwise you’re screwed.
Do you seriously think you’re paying us because otherwise we would be sitting at home watching Spongebob?? Because first of all: fallacy. Secondly, you’re not just paying us for the work we are doing, you’re paying us for that PLUS the opportunity cost of not being somewhere else working for money in a different medium PLUS the fact that you are unable to be there to watch your kids or mow your lawn, or your can’t or don’t want to. In addition, guess what: if your babysitter is actually leaving the baby with a dirty diaper, then A: fire them, and B: think about how much it’s worth to you to have a baby with a clean diaper. Got it? K. Then pay them that much.
Also, you’ve got some holes in your logic: if it costs you 50-75 for a professional lawn service, then paying 30 is pretty good isn’t it? If it costs 40, then 20-25 should make you happy. Those are real numbers. I own a lawn business. Which I bought from a friend. After starting mowing lawns in my neighborhood at 13. I charge much more now because, what’s that? I’M A PROFESSIONAL. And I started where? IN MY BACKYARD. And no, I’m not some exception kid who works all the time and is responsible, blah blah. In fact–no joke–I’m incredibly lazy compared to almost everyone my age around me. My business averages 330-360 lawns per month during school in the early fall.
Oh and love the comment about getting a “real job.” Classy.
Like. 😉
super like
I am dumbfounded! First of all $5 is below minimum wage in most states, if not all!
Children are (or should be) our most precious family members. As a nanny of 33 yrs ,who started her career as a teenage babysitter I can’t stress how extreme the responsibility of having someone else’s children in your care is!
I guess its your call , if you are happy with having someone text their friends while sitting on the couch watching tv ,…brings to mind the the old adage of you get what you pay for !. God forbid there is a medical emergency or such like!
Amen.
I’m glad you give your babysitters the opportunity to turn down your low rate of pay rather than springing it on them AFTER they’ve done the work.
I agree with all the comments of “you get what you pay for.” You seem resentful that these teenagers that you under-pay don’t go the extra mile yet you’re not willing to appropriately compensate someone who would. You don’t like the going rate of quality babysitters in this day and age? Then deal with bad service or stay home.
How convenient for you that you think the people caring for your children — substituting for YOUR job — while you’re gone deserve to be treated cheaply. Going out is a luxury that costs a lot, but I don’t hear you taking it out on movie theaters or restaurants. Instead you want to short-change the kids caring for your most prized treasures.
The only thing I liked about this article was how she suggested stating the wage and expectations upfront. Have you ever shopped at a store where the employees are paid crap? The service is typically bad. You get what you pay for and why would you ever go cheap on the safety and well-being of your children? We don’t have a lot of money (we make 40-50K and have tons of school debt) so we started a babysitting co-op with some friends. When we use a sitter, we pay around $10/hour depending on the age and experience of the sitter for one child. I think paying per child is dumb because $2/hour for one child is not even worth your time. Also, I used to babysit a ton and as a sitter I was not so concerned with how many children as that the money was worth me giving up time with friends on a weekend night. I babysat every Saturday night for a family that typically paid me $5-7 per hour for 3 kids 15 years ago. I once babysat for 4 kids and only got paid $2 per hour. I was so insulted. I wish the family in need would have just asked me to babysit as a service and I would have done it. No one likes to be underpaid. It’s rude. And why are people hiring punk teenagers? If these teens are entitled brats why would you trust them with your kids? There are good teens out there. When you employ someone, you shouldn’t be thinking about how you can save a buck. You should be thinking about how you can be fair and help that person develop skills and do a good job. When you tell a kid, “I think you are only worth $5 an hour” think about what you are saying about that kid. I don’t live in Utah but I am Mormon. Not all Mormons are cheap. I also tip well. It is part of our budget to be fair and generous to those who serve us.
You get what you pay for. I have always valued the babysitter. It gave me time off from my job. I value my kids more than I value the lawn so I always paid the babysitter well. I also provided ice cream.
Here’s how it works on a tight budget. You pay the babysitter the set amount, I paid minimum wage plus $2 per additional children. Then I would offer a bonus if they did any housework. I didn’t care if they didn’t do it. And they didn’t always do it. But they were hired to watch the kids not clean my dishes.
Then hubby and I might walk the beach or listen to a band at a local club. We liked punk. We would buy 1 soda and nurse it all night. Or it would be the matinee. Or a dessert at a nice restaraunt It was about being out with my hubby.
I am still friends with the “kids” who babysat my kids. They are grown, married to each other and have their own family. And they still eat our favorite brand of ice cream.
I like your idea here. I do not see any reason to quibble over the amounts you used in your example, as they are just numbers, but the idea of making sure expectations and payments are expressed prior to the job being done is a good one for any job. As someone who works for commission-by-the-job now (and I have made as little as $3-5/per hour-before taxes- when clients were uncooperative or no-show, and up to about $15 for good ones), I believe that upfront pricing is important. Even with the risk of making that little, I cannot in good conscience do less than my best work, and I love my job.
My son is 12, so since that is young, he only sits when I’m home nearby and I check in with him (Denver area). He took a CPR course, too. He only charges $5/hr (add $1/ hr for each additional kid). That’s on the low side here. I have had friends who won’t pay less than $10-12/hr because they say their children are so precious, why would they trust them to someone who only charges 5? LOL, considering these kids usually don’t have to do very much and don’t pay taxes, 15-20 bucks for an evening of movies and playing — WHICH HELPS OUT A NEIGHBOR IN NEED — is plenty.
I liked this article. I am a stay-at-home mother of 3 kids and we pay $5/hr. You can hate me if you want but my kids are 9, 7, & 4! They can feed themselves, dress themselves and they are completely potty trained. Most babysitters I’ve had leave my house messier than when they got there, and only care about how to work my tv to put a movie on! I got told $15/hr the other day. I just wanted a dinner date with my husband for my birthday! As I’ve said – I’m a SAHM. I can’t afford to spend $45 just for babysitting. In the end, we took our kids with us because it was cheaper. You can all go ahead and say I’m a bad mom because I didn’t want my kids with me but – be honest! – how many of you really want your kids with you ALL THE TIME!?! Stop getting on everyone’s case for not being perfect! No one is!!! Good for you Jan for taking a stand on this because I completely agree with you. I didn’t even go into the comments section until my sister Tilane mentioned it.
Wow! The controversy over this is simply amazing. It really doesn’t matter whether you think a babysitter is worth far more than she is offering or if you think teens should sit for free. The important part of this article is at the very beginning. The rest of it is just window dressing. State what the job expectations are and how much you are willing to pay. If the prospective sitter doesn’t like the terms, he/she can turn the job down. If the parent cannot find a sitter because she is not offering enough, she will either start offering more or figure out some other way to get around having to pay a sitter (swapping with other parents is a great idea.)
I didn’t bother reading all of the comments. Seriously contentious and mean. I’m Mormon and I’m cheap. I know it because of it I’m debt free except my mortgage. My wife and I didn’t go out very much BECAUSE of the cost of a babysitter (and I’m cheap). So here are my thoughts on all your crazy responses:
1) I’m trusting my babysitter to show up, put on a movie and get my kids to bed. I leave a phone number in case anything happens. If I’m going someplace over an hour away, I get an older child and expect to pay more.
2) My children are precious and my wife as a stay-at-home mom makes $0 an hour for watching all of our kids. She does and deals with a heck of lot more than a babysitter and makes NOTHING. We want our kids to grow up and be good parents but only if they get paid to??
3) For anyone under the age of 16, baby-sitting, lawn-mowing, and other chore-jobs are their only source of income. They can’t get a real job yet. They should be grateful for whatever they can get. How much does their mom pay them to babysit their siblings?? Most likely, $0 and hour. Yep, watch your siblings for free or come earn some money watching mine, the choice is totally yours.
4) If you make $10 an hour babysitting, why would you go try and work at McD’s or Little Caesars or any other real business that only pays minimum wage or maybe even $8 an hour BEFORE government skimming? My first professional job 13 years ago paid me $10 and hour and I was thrilled. I had to do a lot more and know a lot more than a babysitter does.
5) I live in Utah. Life is cheaper here. I’m not going to pay a babysitter what someone in NY pays. That’s just stupid. I don’t pay what NYers pay for gas or milk so why would I pay they same for babysitting?
6) If you work in a day-care, you make maybe $10-15 an hour for watching 10+ kids all freaking day. Why would I pay the same for my 5 kids for a couple of hours to someone who IS NOT bonded and insured?
7) Paying a daycare IS NOT like paying a babysitter. A day care pays for all of the electricity, food, heat and other supplies. I’m already paying for all of those when I get a babysitter. And if I offer the babysitter to have some food (cause it is over dinner time) then I’m paying for their meal also.
8) The parents that complain about how “little” their kids make babysitting are the true cheapskates. Why are they complaining? Because that means they now have to pay more for their kids to do stuff. “You aren’t paying my kid enough” is really just saying, “I don’t want to have to pay for my kid’s crap, I want you to pay for it.” Yep.
Flame if you want, I won’t read it. My kid is 13 and she babysits for us for free. So I’ll be out on a date with my wife. Good day.
Great comment!! Especially the last part where you say you’ll be out on a date with your wife!! Hilarious! I agree 100%
Where is the totally freaking LOVE THIS COMMENT button!!!?
I am not crazy about this article…although I agree with the point of kids learning to work hard and work for what the receive. The younger teenagers 13-14 may be happy with $5 an hour, however 15-18 are passing up social opportunities, and often other babysitting jobs to supervise, protect, and entertain a family’s children….that should be worth at least minimum wage. And family’s with 3+ children the chaos, energy and creativity it takes to make things go well should also be considered. Just my take on it…..
2 minutes ago · Edited · Like
First off let me say that this blogger is entitled to her opinion. It is not OK for us to judge her, and to belittle her or others based on their opinions.
What I see most from the comments posted here that i don’t understand is people who are commenting that they do Child Care for a living, or Nanny. This blogger is talking about a young girl 11-16 years of age who babysits for a few hours once or twice a month while the parents go out to dinner or to a movie. Of course if you run a Day Care business or Nanny for a family you would expect to get paid more, but have a background and education in it as well; young girls do not.
I am a mother of 3 young boys, all under 7. When I hire a babysitter, not a nanny… I always have my house clean, usually my kids fed and if not, a dinner is either ready for them to be warmed, and at most a box of mac and cheese will need to be cooked. Their p.j.s laid out, and I do not expect a babysitter to bathe my children. I usually make sure there is some popcorn or something to munch on and a book already picked out for bedtime, if i’m gone that long. All i expect them to do is to sit and play with my children and make sure my house doesn’t burn down!! I have done all the housework for them. I am not paying them to clean and do laundry. I am paying them to watch my kids. I do not want babysitting to be a lot of work. I usually have a redbox movie that my kids picked out there for them to watch. Baby sitting at my house is easy and not a lot of work.
I do not think what I described is worth $15/hour, even with 3 children, and boys at that!! My husband and I usually just go to dinner and are gone maybe 2 hours. I think $10-$15 is fair for the 2 hours. Usually the movie is still going when I get home!! If I could go hang out with kids and watch a movie and take home 15 buck I would happy!! I think it is more than enough for a young girl.
This blogger laid things out really well. I appreciate her opinion and her honesty. I agree with others who have commented that some people pay to be known as the “best payer in the neighborhood.” When I babysat, I was glad to take any job, but loved when the people who paid more called. I didn’t do anything different than I would do for some one else. I probably didn’t deserve how much they paid, but gladly accepted it!!
$5/hour to watch to children is utterly criminal and shows how little you think of not only the babysitter, but also your own children. You probably pay more to park your car in an attended garage. I am appalled that you would write a blog like this and brag about it. How about giving a little less to your cult and a little more to those who work to help with your kids?
I really take offence to your comment I am from Utah and I am LDS my husband and I have an 11 year old and rarely go out. However when we do go out we pay $20.00 an hour for a sitter which is alot more than he even makes an hour. To imply that everyone from Utah who happen to be LDS is cheap is a wrong assumption
As a teenager myself, I have experienced many things while babysitting. Now I don’t mind 15 dollars. It’s money I can save up! I’m actually always happy to get a babysitting job. But I think it’s very judgmental to say we’re selfish. Sure, there are some teenagers out there who are selfish. But I think you should make it sound more like you’re not judging all the teenagers. I have babysat many kids who are well behaved, but when the parent is gone, they start crying or they act up. I babysat a mean little girl for three hours who didn’t listen at all and only got 10 dollars. I wasn’t upset, I was happy that I made money. When a parent is gone, they have no idea how their children are acting. I always make sure to clean up after the kids and have fun with them. I can see where you’re going at how teenagers will just text their friends. I make it a priority to watch the kids and make sure they don’t get into trouble. I don’t like to take my eye off little ones in case they run off and I don’t know what they’re doing. Therefor I do no texting while watching kids. It scares me a lot to think that I’d be responsible if anything happened to someone else’s kid. I want to be a mother of 10 children someday. I know how important it is to keep the children safe. Now what if the child is in bed and it pees? That didn’t necessarily mean we didn’t clean it before they went to bed. Some things you say don’t really make sense. I’m always happy to watch people kids, and I’m always happy with the money I come home with. Thanks though. -Emily